A Letter to My Future Babies

A few blog posts back, I wrote a letter to the babies I lost. Now, I found it fitting to write a letter to my future babies. This is coming off of scheduling my hysterscope coming up in June, which I am very nervous about (another post to come about that at a later time). It got me thinking about everything I would do and go through to have a baby and experience motherhood. So, here goes. I am sure this will change as time goes, but for now, this is what’s on my heart.

Dear Precious Child/ren,

I write this to you amidst our struggle to have you. You’ve already been conceived and created, but you’re sitting in a laboratory, in a freezer, waiting to be thawed and moved to my body for safe keeping for nine months. I know that it sounds weird to say that you are sitting in a freezer, so let me explain that. Mommy and Daddy were having a hard time conceiving you naturally, the way God intended, so He sent us a little help by allowing us to do in-vitro fertilization (IVF). We loved you so much, even right now and you’re not even physically here with us, that we went to great lengths to have you. We paid a lot of money, and took a lot of medications for the chance to have you. 

You have three siblings living in heaven that weren’t able to make it to earth to see us. God had other plans for them, so he took them to heaven to be with Him. That was hard for us, but we are happy to know where they are. 

But here you are. You are the one that God allowed us to have. The one that made us actual, physical parents. You are the one who made our dreams come true, and you are the one completing our family. You, my precious child, are the one we’ve longed for, the one our hearts longed for, the one we loved before we even knew. 

So, I tell you this, sweet child, we promise to love you until the end of time. We will do absolutely anything we can to give you the life you deserve, a life you will enjoy and have so many memories of. We will always remind you of how you came to be on this earth and how God hand picked you and created you in His image. We will make sure you are always loved, always supported, never forgotten. If you hurt, I hurt. If you cry, I cry. If you smile, I smile. I will embrace every moment, good or bad, with you by my side and will cherish every moment that God allows us to be together. 

As I sit here, finishing this up, I am reminded of a song by Savage Garden called I Knew I Loved You. The chorus goes as so: 

I knew I loved you before I met you
I think I dreamed you into life
I knew I loved you before I met you
I have been waiting all my life

This may be intended for a couple in love, but I think it fits our situation so perfectly. 

Beautiful baby! Mommy and Daddy love you so much and are so grateful that we are allowed to be your parents, because child, you are special and a true miracle from heaven.

XOXO

With all my heart, 

Mommy